tears in heaven
Eric Clapton

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven
I must be strong
And carry on
'Cos I know I don't belong
Here in heaven

Would you hold my hand
If I saw you in heaven
Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven
I'll find my way through night and day
I just can't stay
Here in heaven

Time can bring you down
Time can bend your knees
Time can break your heart
Have you begging please
Begging please

Beyond the door
There's peace I'm sure
And I know
There'll be no more
Tears in heaven

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven
I must be strong and carry on
'Cos I know I don't belong
Here in heaven.

::so many things on my mind::
its like riding a see-saw..you're way above the world one moment and hit rock bottom not long after...up, down...up, down, up down...it won't stop. at least not till either one gets off...am i going to be the one to make the first move to jump off when i first hit the ground? but then the other will come crashing down to..everyone gets hurt...why does it have to be this way??

::please stop crying...i love you::
its the simple things in life like spending time with the people you care about that make you forget for a moment all the unhappiness in your life and smile like you've never smiled before. edith, yuwen thanks for going all over the place with me and doing my shopping and collecting my jeans with me.enjoyed your company. i had a great time. but stupid girl make me walk so far..but the place was lovely...so nice and cosy..but so cold! it was dimly lit and we sat beneath the cover of the elevator. the gentle aroma of coffee, the sweet taste of cinnamon. but best of all, our laughter and warmth of everyone. this is what i call happiness...
and knowing that i did something to make you smile, thats happiness too...

barely had time to stop and take a breath i'm exhausted from the string of activities thrown in my face. confused from the different emotions welling up inside me. but then some of these i wanna keep and never forget. sometimes its nice to savour the moment and hold on to the memory, replaying it in my mind, a smile playing at the edge of my lips.

friday was a blast. i had a wonderful time. dance in the morning was horrendous but the day out and the night home more than made up for everything. had a real real girlie day out. sumiko, ada, luana, kim, deena, elieen thanks for everything. i honestly did enjoy myself tremendously. seriously miss having girl company. when you hang out with guys too much, you can't help but miss your girlfriends! *smile*

the party at my house was as julian would say," number one!" +laughs+ silly boy got drunk...hee² well so did ben he was like so so gone! and everyone was lancing and honestly going way mad but it was really great fun. okay i'm so gushing! lijie, abby, alvyn, ryan too...thank each and everyone of you for coming. we really should do it again sometime soon. this time..must find nicer house and more drinks...i want baileys! love you all so much..*muaks*

::why did you have to leave::
climb up that few steps only to find myself back in the hole again. does sunlight shine only for that blink of and eye and then to take cover behind the clouds again? it's such a tease, enticing me with its sweetness and light then pulling away again leaving behind darkness and bitterness and that longing and thirst for somemore. even if it were to just be a glimsp or a brief touch, i'd be contented. if not for always, at least for a little while. my life seems to be lived so much on borrowed and stolen time. when will it truely be mine?

dead tired. had dance every single freaking day of the week. Argh. i hate britney and madonna. really i do. hear the damn song replaying itself in my head over and over again. i'm about to go mad. the dance is nice though i must admit it. just hate the blasted song.

::thank you god::
a breeze has started blowing. creeping through the trees into my private warm enclave. i feel the cold slice through every inch of my body. the wind picks up the leaves on the ground and suspend them in mid air..they hover in front of me, as though trying to tell me something then faster and faster they swirl round till all i see is a blur of yellow orange and brown...
i made it! he did too. a big celebration is in order. mixed feelings. glad my class made it. so did a lot of people dear to me. just wished i had done better i guess. should i drop div? sigh. i really dont know..argh..anyway the party was great! wee~ *beams*

here without you
three doors down
A hundred days had made me older
since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lights had made me colder
and I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles had separate
They disappeared now when I’m dreaming of your face

I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it’s only you and me

The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello
I hear this life is overrated but I hope it gets better as we go

I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams

+please let it work out+
hues of yellow pink and purple flutter among the shades of green. lie down on the grass, feel you beside me. smile and look up at the magnolia blue sky and the ferocious sunlight peeking through the thick foilage of the trees towering overhead. i have always dreamt of days like this. full of endless fun and laughter with not a care on our minds except the knowledge and the joy of you by my side.

watched a time to dance today. i think dance is beautiful. the music just takes over you and you feel a sense of freedom as you throw yourself into each carefuly executed movement. no longer yourself, you're moulded to become part of the dance, part of the song. i wish i could dance as beautifully as she did. but i know i never will.

met alot of people today along the streets. but know what? i'm proud to be with you. i'm happy. i really truely am. floating high above the skies..please don't let me fall..

+you make me smile+
the weekend seems to have passed my in a blur of events...everything seems to be happening so quickly..but you're right, take one step at a time. i shall enjoy and treasure each and every moment as it comes to me. *smile* i feel like i've never fully recovered from feeling high and slightly drunk last night. feel myself floating in this sea of happiness...keep smiling to myself..i think everyone around me thinks that i'm a little mad. *laughs* but then i don't really care...

the rain seemed to have washed everything clean...even the stars and moon were erased from the sky - it was a sheet of black velvet, beautiful and flawless. perfect. a solitary boat glided gracefully across the water, causing gentle ripples on the surface. as gentle as the kisses that were being exchanged...as gentle as each soft caress..

::how can i ever bear to leave you::

had a lovely time peoplesabby.alvyn,andy,ben,lijie,julian,junwen,shiwei thank you so much. i had tons and tons of fun today! the sun was lovely the sand was lovely everyone of you were lovely! i love the feel of the sun beating down on me, the sound of the waves crashing against the shore the sight of the white clouds against the magnolia blue sky...ladidas..in many ways, i guess i am happy..hope this lasts..*fingers crossed*

::but i miss you::
have you ever woken up in the morning and realised that you have no idea what you wanna do with your life? its half past ten. i have the whole day stretched out infront of me to do as i please. but i still feel that same sense of uncertainty and loss. seems so wierd to know that i have no more studying left to do. guess now that everything is over. dont know what i'm supposed to do next.

::i live for me::
i take the first tentative step forward. squint my eyes, unaccustomed to the bright light. i pause, that sense of apprehension and fear building up inside me. i taste the bitterness on my tongue, i feel the sharp pain on my lips.. in my heart. i will not look back. there's nothing to return to now. it was wall just writings on the sand washed away by the tide when it swept in. no trace no memory except in my mind. maybe time will heal the wounds. but then again, maybe not. i take a deep breath and reach out for the hand infont of me...and smile. its not the end. only the begining of a brand new start.

lalalas..im so nice..do ur blog for you..=) hees..learn to make urself la..im supposed to be studying geog now,lor..den still help u sumore..mst be thankful mans..hrumphs..hees..=) lalalas..kkae..shall go study now already..be a good girl..=) hees..u lucky pig finished exams already..bleah..oh wells..jst a few more days fer me! =) luv youu!! mwah+
stelli*

*[ butterflies may fly away
but angels will always stay ]*